Directed by: John MooreStarring: Mark Wahlberg, Milla Kunis, Beau Bridges
Other Actors of Note: Donal Logue, Ludacris
Plot: Coming together to solve a series of murders in New York City are a DEA agent (Wahlberg) whose family was slain as part of a conspiracy and an assassin (Kunis) out to avenge her sister's death. The duo will be hunted by the police, the mob, and a ruthless corporation. Taken from www.imdb.com.
For those not in the know, "Max Payne" is another of those tiresome video game movies joining the ranks of "Wing Commander", "Resident Evil", "Silent Hill", "Mortal Kombat", "Street Fighter", "Bloodrayne", "Alone in the Dark", "House of the Dead", "In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale", "Postal", "Doom", "Tomb Raider", "Dead or Alive", and "Double Dragon."
Now as you can see, the above list is a cavalcade of suck which features movies that are at best mediocre and at worst likely to cause you to go sterile and tear out your eyes with a plastic spork. Now, I'm glad to say that "Max Payne" is not spork-worthy in fact it's actually quite good.
It's the story of Max Payne (who'da guessed?) a loose cannon cop on the edge after the death of his wife and child. Max spends long hours trying to solve the case and find out who killed his family by being a vigilante overnight and blah, blah, blah, revenge, blah, blah, bullet time, blah, blah.
If you're wondering: Yes, it is essentially "The Punisher." But I'm sure it's an homage, not at all a ripoff. *cough*bullshit*cough*
Mark Wahlberg manages to do everything right that he did wrong in "The Happening." Sure, Max Payne is a mostly taciturn emotionally retarded guy who is constantly boiling with apathetic rage, but Wahlberg manages to play this off without seeming like he's constipated (which is more than can be said for the game version.) He brings a 2-D character to a solid 2-and-a-half-D. Wahlberg plays much of the role silently and that's how he really brings out the intensity of the character.
Mila Kunis is far too much of the ditzy high school type to play the character she does. She comes as close to the sleek dark-eyeshadow wearing hitwoman as margarine does to butter. (Close, but there's a slight aftertaste that may or may not give you cancer.) She does as best she can, but still sounds too much like the annoying chick who cried when she didn't have a homecoming date in high school to be believable.
Beau Bridges plays the usual nice guy/evil businessman. He's almost a straight-up carbon copy of brother Jeff Bridges in "Iron Man" earlier this year. Though honestly, Jeff was a bit more menacing but on the other hand Beau seems less like a complete prick from the beginning.
Ludacris is part of the long standing tradition of hiring rappers to play roles that are miles beyond their acting capabilities. You may remember such hits as LL Cool J, Busta Rhymes, Ice Cube, Ice-T, and a host of other famously godawful performances. Ludacris is no acception with bland line delivery and is about as convincing as a piece of wax fruit trying to play Citizen Kain.
Donal Logue is your typical side-kick type that he always is. He plays Max's former partner Alex Balder, he's less of a joke than he is in most movies. He actually seems to do much better as a serious character than as the comedic relief. Sadly, Logue doesn't get much screen time. Which is sad as he's better than a lot of people who we have to put up with for most of the movie.
Amaury Nolasco plays a big scary guy with machete/sword thing. He mostly just looks creepy and hits things. But... see, he does it really well. 'Tis not the size of the part, 'tis how you play it. Ultimately his character also doesn't get much screen time in favor of more of Beau Bridges and Mila Kunis' dry, weak performances.
One thing that "Max Payne" has never been well-known for is its stunning storyline. It was more about running into a room full of people and taking six and a half hours to work the pump on your shotgun before Max finally thought about pulling the trigger. Upon pressing the fire button you had time to go make a sandwich, watch Peter Jackson's "King Kong", and earn at very least your brown belt in karate before having to worry about even aiming at anything.
The game was clunky and slow but "revolutionary" for its time. As bullet time was still "fucking rad" at the time and it was totally cool to turn the noir meter up to 12. (For reference, Frank Miller's "Sin City" was about a 9.)
Fortunately (or unfortunately if you're a fanboy) the director threw all this stupid shit out. Is there bullet time? Yes, there is one instance of bullet time toward the end that last all of 30 seconds. Is there noirish narration? Yes, but only at the beginning and the end of the movie (where it belongs.)
Now of course fans of the series have been rewarded. Wahlberg is the splitting image of Max Payne (or at least "Max Payne 2's" Max Payne, the one from the original looked like a mix between the "Grand Theft Auto 3" guy and a constipated Johnny Knoxville.) the story remains fundamentally the same except its been changed to give it a finer cinematic quality. Also the drug VALKYR in the film is said to give a small 1% super-soldier abilites, rendering the user nigh-unkillable which works to explain why Max can contain more lead than the lining of a fallout shelter and still walk around all broody whilsty shooting anything that moves.
Max isn't the ass-kicking bullet machine in the game, in fact you'll find that much of the movie involves Max getting his beat up, shot, or running from other people until the climax of the film. (which is also not quite what you'd expect.) But worry not, Max has a 9-millimeter pistol that holds roughly 5000 rounds per clip and apparently fires buffalo shot.
The honest fact that everyone needs to come to term with is that this is not an action movie. "Max Payne" is a film-noir drama that just happens to feature action. It's a revenge movie, but more "Walking Tall" than "Death Wish."
If anyone kills peoples' enjoyment of this movie it will be false expectations. Most people went in expecting an action movie which will result in a lot of disappointment. A lot of people also apparently thought that this movie was going to have to do with killer angels or something due to the Valkyries seen in the trailer that appear as a hallucination as a result of taking the drug VALKYR. Why anybody would be disappointed that a stupid concept like "vengeful cop meats scary bird women" wasn't real is beyond me, but then again "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" was a box office success, so I guess I'm just underestimating the collective stupidity of American audiences.
One of the strangest things (and this is mostly just the fault of the game) is the references to Norse mythology. The angel things being Valkyries, the drug VALKYR, pharmacutical company Aesir, Max's former partner Alex Balder, the Ragnarok club... If half expected Max to call his gun "Mjolnir." (Hey, it's more catchy than "Ebony" and "Ivory" Screw you, Dante.) This never made sense to me as its really nothing more than a tiny mcguffin that has nothing to do with anything in the game.
But enough about the game. The visuals are stunning, remaining so dark and ashy that it brings a solitary tear of joy to Tim Bradstreet's eye. It's always either snowing or raining in Max Payne's city, but in backgrounds and at the triumphant ending of the film the sun comes out and everything is bright and sunny. Sure its a visual style that's about as subtle as a dumptruck backfiring in a nitroglycerine plant, but it still looks good. The shots of the fiery drug-induced Valkyr world, the night club, and the icy river are equally as entrancing.
The sets are all in some form of disarray, either looking trashed or old. Max apparently got his cavernous single bedroom apartment from the same building as the black cop from "Saw IV." Really the only acception to the rule is the Aesir building which is always polished and sterile looking.
The storyline is fittingly dark and compelling while not getting too complicated. Mila Kunis could have been crammed in as the usual side-romance story, but mercifully that gets saved for another film (watch after the credits.)
"Max Payne" is not a perfect movie. It has its failures, most of them being from where the director tried to appeal to fans of the game. Ultimately people need to just accept that this movie is not like the game at all, it has vastly surpassed the game in every way shape and form proving that a turd apparently can be polished into something fairly nice.
Don't take it as a video game movie, that will only hurt what is otherwise a great film.
I give "Max Payne" a 4 out of 5. It doesn't need to be on your shelf, but you should definitely see it.
That 3rd picture is totally from "Shooter", my bad.
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